Chuck Norris did 5 successful suicide bomb missions
People have near-death experiences. Death has Near-Chuck-Norris experiences.
The first time Chuck Norris won a game of poker was when his apponant reaveled his full house; then Chuck Norris reaveled his roundhouse.
When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay: "What is courage?" He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
Chuck Norris can land a multi-hit combo with only one punch.
Across all of the infinite number of parallel universes the version of Chuck Norris is the same. Nature knows perfection when she sees it.
Before going to bed, the Boogeyman always checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
The climate requires Chuck's permission to change.
Chuck Norris turns his game off while saving.
If Chuck Norris ran for president, the competition would drop out, and he would get infinite terms.
A time paradox was invented when Chuck Norris went back in time to raise himself. Now he has provoked the event 2012.