Why doesn’t Mexico have an Olympic team?
All the Mexicans who can run, jump or swim are already in the USA.
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Yo Momma's a bowling ball.
She is round and heavy, men stick three fingers into her and push her in the gutter.
Then she comes rolling back for more.
Why did the referee have such a high phone bill?
Because he made to many calls!
What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench?
The NBA
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George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, Colin Powell, and Bill Clinton were on the yellow brick road, going to see the Wizard of Oz.
When they got there, the Wizard of Oz said they could each have one wish.
''I want to have brains,'' said George W. POOF! He got some brains.
''I want to have a heart,'' said Dick Cheney. POOF! He had a heart (albeit a problematic one.)
''I want to have courage,'' said Colin Powell. POOF! He had courage.
Finally it was former President, Bill Clinton's turn. ''Well, what do you want?'' asked the Wizard.
Clinton thought a moment and asked, ''Ummm... Is Dorothy around?''
Billy: "I was playing basketball and an Asian crossed me."
Mark: "Haha, how does an Asian cross you?"
Billy: "Because he crosses multiplies."
Q: Why can't orphans play baseball?
A: They don't know where home is.
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What’s the difference between an aerobics instructor and a torturer?
The torturer would apologize first.
They presented him with a cup when he was a boxer.
It was to keep his teeth in.
A man had an idea that could make him rich. After it was perfected he brought it to an inventors' help group.
When asked what his great invention was, he pulled out an apple.
The group looked at it and started laughing.
The inventor said, "You don't understand! Taste it."
A volunteer tried it and said, "Mmmmmmm, tastes like peaches."
The inventor said, "Flip it over."
He flipped it over and took another chunk of the apple. "Mmmmmmmm, tastes like grapes."
The inventor offered a new apple and the volunteer said, "What does it taste like?"
"Pussy," said the inventor.
The guy bit into it, and spit it out with an awful look on his face and shouted, "That tasted like ass!"
The inventor winked and said, "Flip it over."