Joke #4085

What do you call an elephant that lies across the middle of a tennis court? Annette!

Dad shouts: "Stop watching porn, I can hear it in my room!" Son: "Dad.. I'm not watching porn, that is Maria Sharapova playing Tennis!"

There are these two guys named John and Cliff. They were best friends and were so obsessed with baseball that they would go to 60 games a year and analyze every scoreboard. They even promised each other that when one of them goes to heaven, the deceased one would come back and tell the other whether there was baseball in heaven or not. One night Cliff dies in his sleep after watching a Chicago White Sox game — Chicago won, so at least he died a happy man. The next day Cliff returns to earth to see his friend. "Hi, John.”" "Cliff, is it really you?" "Hey, I told you I’d be back to tell you what’s up. And, you know John, there’s good news and bad news." "Okay. What’s the good news?" "There is baseball in heaven." "The bad news?" "You’re pitching tomorrow night."

Three men go on a skiing trip, but when they get to the HOTEL they find out that the hotel have mucked up their rooms and they have to share one big bed. When they wake up the guy on the left says I had a well strange dream last night that I was getting a hand job, and then the guy on the right goes thats strange O had the same dream I was getting a hand job. Then the guy in the middle goes well thats strange because I had a dream I was skiing!

Did you hear about the man who won the gold medal at the Olympics? He had it bronzed.

Chuck Norris once bowled a 300... Without a ball... He wasn't even in a bowling ally.

What does NBA stand for Niggas Boucing Around.

Chuck Norris can won the winter Olympics... In the summer.

Whats the difference between usain bolt and hitler? Usain bolt can finish a race...

Why is there no mexican olympics? Because everyone who can run, jump, or swim is already across the boarder.

I used to play tennis, baseball, basketball and chess, but I stopped after my son broke my playstation.