Why did the Irishman give up internet shopping? The trolley kept falling off the computer.
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1000 mi/gal." Recently General Motors addressed this comment by releasing the statement: "Yes, but would you want your car to crash twice a day?"
Q: Why did the bodybuilder buy tape from the hardware store? A: Somebody told him he was ripped!
Error, no keyboard. Press F1 to continue.
Why did the computer get cold? Because it forgot to close windows.
99 little bugs in the code, 99 bugs in the code, 1 bug fixed... Compile again, 100 little bugs in the code.
Why did the lumberjack get nowhere with the internet? He kept logging on and off.
CAPS LOCK – Preventing Login Since 1980.
Why didn’t the internet get any e-mail? Because his e-dog kept chasing the e-postman.
A project manager, a computer programmer and a computer operator are driving down the road when the car they are in gets a flat tire. The three men try to solve the problem. The project manager said: "Let's catch a cab and in ten minutes we'll reach our destination." The computer programmer said: "We have here the driver's guide. I can easily replace the flat tire and continue our drive." The computer operator said: "First of all, let's turn off the engine and turn it on again. Maybe it will fix the problem." Suddenly a Microsoft software engineer passed by and said: "Try to close all windows, get off the car, and then get in and try again."
I changed my password to "incorrect". So whenever I forget what it is the computer will say "Your password is incorrect".