Chuck Norris takes care of his guardian angel.
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Chuck Norris lost both his legs in a car accident, but he still managed to walk it off.
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The first paper money press was invented when Chuck Norris drew a design under his boot and stepped on a tree.
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Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died.
The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible.
All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
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When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks, physics decides to shut up.
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Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
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Chuck Norris can copy and paste on a typewriter.
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A horror movie is Chuck's comedy.
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Ballet is banned within a 1000 miles of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris abducts aliens.
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In the game 'Spore', The Grox are a result of Chuck Norris being allowed to create a species, but they had to be weakened to make the game possible.
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