Joke #8149

Chuck Norris takes care of his guardian angel.
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The cops pulled Chuck Norris over for going 55 miles per hour on the freeway. But since he wasn't in a car, they had to give him a ticket for jaywalking.
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Chuck Norris can mute silence.
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If you ask Chuck Norris what time it is, he always says, "Two seconds 'till." After you ask, "Two seconds 'til what?" he roundhouse kicks you in the face.
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The best security system for a bank is when Chuck's money is in it.
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Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
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Chuck Norris can never fill out an online form, because Chuck Norris will never submit.
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NASA is negotiating with Chuck Norris about using his roundhouse kick as a propulsion to get to Mars.
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Everybody knows that Chuck Norris can't shoot a bow even though he got 5 bullseyes in a row. The only reason he got the bullseye is that his arrows know better than to miss.
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Q: You know the Roman Empire, well how do you think it fell? A: Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris once broke the sound barrier. In half.
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