Chuck Norris can remember the future.
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When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive.
The zombies do.
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Chuck Norris is proof that legends never die.
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Chuck Norris doesn't flirt all he says is NOW.
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Chuck Norris doesn't buy life insurance, life buys Chuck insurance.
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Chuck Norris stem cells can reproduce missing limbs.
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Chuck Norris doesn't check under his bed for monsters, monsters check on top of the bed to see if Chuck Norris is sleeping.
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Chuck Norris can over rev a revolver.
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R. Lee Ermey's war face is the face he made when he saw Chuck Norris ready to attack.
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Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
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For breakfast Chuck Norris enjoys toast and jellyfish.
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