Joke #4084

What do golfers use in China? China tees!
Vote: has 16.16 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Q: What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver? A: A bad golfer goes *Whack!* "Darn!", but a bad skydiver goes "Darn!" *WHACK!*
Vote: has 61.44 % from 107 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: golf, sport
A man farts in bed next to his wife. His wife asks, "What in the world was that?" He replies, "Touchdown. I'm winning, seven nothing." She decides to get even, so she lets one loose. He yells at her, "What was that?" She replies, "Touchdown, tie score." He wants to get her back, but he tries so hard he sh*ts in bed. The wife asks, "Now what in the world was that?" He replies, "Halftime, switch sides."
Vote: has 69.93 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart, sport, wife
Why do men need instant replay on TV sports? Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.
Vote: has 31.56 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men, sport, technology, time
What does a nigress and an ice hockey player have in common? They both change their pads after 3 periods.
Vote: has 43.65 % from 59 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, sport
Chuck Norris won the Tour De France on a stationary bike.
Vote: has 68.45 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, sport
How about we march into your red zone and I'll split the uprights? High five!
Vote: has 11.95 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport
Why did the football coach go to the bank? "To get his Quarter back."
Vote: has 31.56 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: football, sport
A sailor and a priest were playing golf. The sailor took his first shot missed and said, "F**k, I missed." Surprised, the priest replied, "Don’t use that kind of language or god will punish you." The sailor took aim and hit his shot second shot. Again he missed and under his breath the said, "I f**k’n missed again." The priest overheard and replied, "My son, please don’t use that language or god will punish you." The sailor took his third shot and once again he couldn’t help mutter, "Oh f**k" The priest said, "That’s it god will certainly punish you." Suddenly a bolt of lightning came down and killed the priest. In the distance a deep voice said, "F**K, I Missed."
Vote: has 63.00 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, god, golf, priest, sport
The Pope met with the College of Cardinals to discuss a proposal from Shimon Peres, the former leader of Israel. "Your holiness," said one of the Cardinals, "Mr. Peres wants to determine whether Jews or Catholics are superior, by challenging you to a golf match." The Pope was greatly disturbed, as he had never held a golf club in his life. "Not to worry," said the Cardinal, "we'll call America and talk to Jack Nicklaus. We'll make him a Cardinal, he can play Shimon Peres... We can't lose!" Everyone agreed it was a good idea. The call was made and, of course, Jack was honored and agreed to play. The day after the match, Nicklaus reported to the Vatican to inform the Pope of his success in the match. "I came in second, your Holiness," said Nicklaus. "Second?!!" exclaimed the surprised Pope. "You came in second to Shimon Peres?!!" "No," said Nicklaus, "second to Rabbi Woods."
Vote: has 63.00 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport
A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says, "You can't bring that dog in here." "You don't understand," says the man. "This is no regular dog, he can talk." "Listen, pal," says the bartender. "If that dog can talk, I'll give you a hundred bucks. "The man puts the dog on a stool, and asks him, "What's on top of a house?" "Roof!" "Right. And what's on the outside of a tree?" "Bark!" "And who's the greatest baseball player of all time?" "Ruth!" "I guess you've heard enough," says the man. "I'll take the hundred in twenties." The bartender is furious. "Listen, pal," he says, "get out of here before I belt you." As soon as they're on the street, the dog turns to the man and says, "Do you think I should have said 'DiMaggio'?"
Vote: has 57.35 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, bar, bartender, sport