Joke #4084

What do golfers use in China? China tees!

A man had an idea that could make him rich. After it was perfected he brought it to an inventors' help group. When asked what his great invention was, he pulled out an apple. The group looked at it and started laughing. The inventor said, "You don't understand! Taste it." A volunteer tried it and said, "Mmmmmmm, tastes like peaches." The inventor said, "Flip it over." He flipped it over and took another chunk of the apple. "Mmmmmmmm, tastes like grapes." The inventor offered a new apple and the volunteer said, "What does it taste like?" "Pussy," said the inventor. The guy bit into it, and spit it out with an awful look on his face and shouted, "That tasted like ass!" The inventor winked and said, "Flip it over."

Everyone could tell our son was a Tigers fan. When he was handed his diploma, he dropped it.

Golf was once a rich man’s sport, but now it has millions of poor players.

Yo mama's so skinny, she used a needle for a baseball bat.

Q: What is the difference between Cheerios and Georgia Tech? A: Cheerios belong in a bowl.

Twenty teams in the league and you are in the last place? Well, it could have been worse. How? There could have been more teams in the league!

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette all enter the International Breast Stroke Swim across the English Channel. After about 8 hours, the brunette makes it across, followed shortly by the redhead. No sign of the blonde. After 12 hours they decide they'd better go look for her when she pretty much washes up on shore. They rush over to her and wrap her in warm blankets and give her a hot drink. After a few minutes, she is breathing easier and says, "I don't like to tattle, but I think those other ladies were using their arms!"

To give you an idea of the kind of season we've had, the person who handled our side of the scoreboard was sick for three weeks and nobody noticed.

Chuck Norris can dunk a basketball using his feet.

A couple of pigeons made a date to meet on the ledge on the tenth floor of a skyscraper. The female was there on time, but the male arrived an hour late. "Where were you? I was worried sick." "It was such nice day, I decided to walk."