What do golfers use in China?
China tees!
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An amateur golfer is one who addresses the ball twice: once before swinging, and once again after swinging.
Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.
A redhead, a blonde and a brunette were stuck on an island and had to get back home from the island.
The redhead swims half way and drowns.
The brunette swims half way and drowns too.
The blonde swims halfway gets tired and swims back.
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Q: How do the Dallas Cowboys spend their first week at spring training?
A: Studying their Miranda Rights.
Q: Why there are many bubbles on the pool's water?
A: Swimmers are farting.
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Kobe Bryant wears the number 24 to remind himself about how many seconds he has to hog the ball.
A little boy was overheard talking to himself as he strutted through the backyard, wearing his baseball cap and toting a ball and bat: "I'm the greatest hitter in the world!" Then, he tossed the ball into the air, swung at it, and missed. "Strike One!" he yelled.
Undaunted, he picked up the ball and said again, "I'm the greatest hitter in the world!" He tossed the ball into the air.
When it came down he missed again. "Strike Two!" he cried.
The boy then paused a moment to examine his bat and ball carefully. He spit on his hands and rubbed them together.
He straightened his cap and said once more, "I'm the greatest hitter in the world!"
Again he tossed the ball up in the air and swung at it.
He missed. "Strike Three!"
"Wow!" he exclaimed. "I'm the greatest pitcher in the world!"
What does NBA stand for Niggas Boucing Around.
A man had an idea that could make him rich. After it was perfected he brought it to an inventors' help group.
When asked what his great invention was, he pulled out an apple.
The group looked at it and started laughing.
The inventor said, "You don't understand! Taste it."
A volunteer tried it and said, "Mmmmmmm, tastes like peaches."
The inventor said, "Flip it over."
He flipped it over and took another chunk of the apple. "Mmmmmmmm, tastes like grapes."
The inventor offered a new apple and the volunteer said, "What does it taste like?"
"Pussy," said the inventor.
The guy bit into it, and spit it out with an awful look on his face and shouted, "That tasted like ass!"
The inventor winked and said, "Flip it over."
The Winter Olympics.
Letting white people win at sports no one else can afford to learn.
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