What do you get if you cross a football team and an ice cream? Aston Vanilla.
Chuck Norris can dunk a basketball using his feet.
The secret of good golf is to hit the ball hard, straight and not too often.
Q: What do gay guys have in common with bungee jumpers? A: If the rubber breaks, they're in deep shit!
Everyone should stop hating on Lance Armstrong. He won 7 Toure De France's on DRUGS! When I'm on drugs, I can't even FIND my bicycle.
Why do men need instant replay on TV sports? Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.
I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.
Golfer: "Think I'm going to drown myself in the lake." Caddy: "I don't think you can keep your head down that long."
Chuck Norris can bungee jump with out a rope.
One day, the Devil challenged the Lord to a baseball game. Smiling the Lord proclaimed, "You don't have a chance; I have Babe Ruth, Mickey Mantle, and all the greatest players up here". "Yes", snickered the devil, "but I have all the umpires."
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought "Dunkin' Donuts" was a basketball team.