When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.
Chuck Norris broke a mirror and got 7 years of good luck.
When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror, he gets jealous.
Chuck Norris once separated his powers into five people, they are now called The Avengers.
Whenever Chuck Norris rolls a 6 sided dice, he always rolls a 7.
Chuck Norris once drank a Red Bull and the can grew wings.
The Question Mark was invented after scientists attempted to measure the speed of a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
Chuck Norris knows who's buried in Grant's Tomb.
Chuck Norris one checked the Library of Congress for typos during his lunch hour.
Chuck Norris reads with his eyes closed.
Chuck Norris doesn't need to change the past. He has never made any mistakes.