Joke #4246

When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide. When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.
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Chuck Norris can sit at the corner of a round table
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Chuck Norris can spell the longest word in the English language with only three letters.
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James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator. However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
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Chuck Norris's favourite drink is diamond juice, which he squeezes out of raw diamonds with his bare hands.
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Chuck Norris can put 13 eggs in a dozen carton.
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The sun cannot look directly at Chuck Norris. It must use specialized equipment just to gaze upon his silhouette
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The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
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Chuck Norris once uppercut a horse and that is how the giraffe was created.
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Chuck Norris won a guitar battle with a violin.
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When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ass, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face.
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