Chuck Norris can hear pictures.
In the late 80's When Michael Jackson first met Chuck Norris he turned white.
Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
Osama Bin Laden is hiding from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris haunts ghosts.
Chuck Norris is ambidextrous. He can do Roundhouse kicks with his left and right leg. All at the same time.
Chuck Norris CAN read Lady Gaga's poker face.
No matter how fast you run, Chuck Norris will always walk faster.
Chuck Norris kills time in his spare time.
The Grimm Reaper fears the day Chuck Norris comes for him.
Chuck Norris, Mr T and Arnold Swieznigger died in a plane crash they got to heavens door way and god asked them what there business is. Arnold replied "I want to be your right hand man". Mr T said "I wanna be your left hand man". Chuck Norris said "get the fuck out of my chair".