What time does Andy Murray go to his bed? Ten-ish.
Hey babe, can I get into your penalty box? High five!
Chuck Norris can won the winter Olympics... In the summer.
Q:What's the hardest thing about learning to play tennis? A:Telling your parents that your gay!
Basketball is the perfect game for a black person. All you do is run, shoot and steal.
How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist? A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs.
Chuck norris went skydiving and his parachute failed to open, so he took it back the next day for a refund
Everyone should stop hating on Lance Armstrong. He won 7 Toure De France's on DRUGS! When I'm on drugs, I can't even FIND my bicycle.
A Scottish man was at a baseball game. It was the first time he had ever seen the sport so he sat quietly. The first batter approached the plate, took a few swings and then hit a double. Everyone was on their feet screaming “Run, run!” This happened two more times, with a single and a triple. The Scottish man was now excited and ready to get into the game. The next batter came up and four balls went by. The umpire called “walk” and the batter started on a slow trot to first. The Scotsman, extremely excited now, stood up and screamed, “R-R-Run ye ba$$tarrd, rrrun!” Everyone around him started laughing so the Scotsman, extremely embarrassed, sat back down. The fan sitting next to the Scotsman noticed his embarrassment, so he leaned over and explained, “He can’t run because he got four balls.” The Scotsman immediately stood up and screamed, “Walk with pride, man! Walk with pride!”
What’s the difference between an aerobics instructor and a torturer? The torturer would apologize first.
When Chuck Norris goes to a BBL cricket game, he doesn't watch out for the big hits from the players, the big hits watch out for him!