Golf: A five-mile walk punctuated with disappointments.
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Whats the difference between usain bolt and hitler?
Usain bolt can finish a race...
Chuck Norris can dunk a basketball using his feet.
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Yo' Mama is like a heavyweight boxer: a few licks, a few blows, and she's back to her corner.
Two guys on a double bike where pedaling up a hill.
It took forever to get to the top.
When they finally got to the top the first guy said in a pant, "Whew, that was so hard."
The second replied, "If I hadn't been pushing the brakes the whole time we would have rolled down backwards."
After meeting with Chuck Norris' lawyer the UFC have changed their name from "Ultimate Fighting Championship" to simply "Fighting Championship."
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Why are old socks good for golf?
Because they have eighteen holes.
Yo mama's so stupid, she thought "Dunkin' Donuts" was a basketball team.
Yo mama's so skinny, she used a needle for a baseball bat.
Where's the safest place to be when a bunch of white guys are playing basketball?
Under the Hoop
