Why are old socks good for golf?
Because they have eighteen holes.
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Q: What did the basketball say to the player?
A: Please don't shoot me.
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Barcelona beats every team in the world, Chuck Norris can beat Barcelona... by himself.
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Why do golfers wear two pairs of trousers?
In case they get a hole in one!
Yo momma so stupid she thinks a quarterback is a refund!
The Karate Kid killed caught a fly with two chopsticks, Chuck Norris killed a rhino with one.
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I thought I told you to lose weight.
Says the coach.
What happened to your three week diet that I told you to keep?
Well, I finished it in three days!
Police have found the body of a man in the Thames wearing a Chelsea shirt, womens underwear, fishnet stockings, suspenders and with an extra large dildo stuck up his arse.
They have removed the Chelsea shirt to save the family any embarrassment ...
Chuck norris went skydiving and his parachute failed to open, so he took it back the next day for a refund
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Three fans were bemoaning the sorry state of their football team.
"I blame the general manager," said the first fan. "If he signed better players, we'd be a great team."
"I blame the players," said the
second fan. "If they made more of
an effort, we'd score some points."
"I blame my parents," said the third. "If I'd been born in Seattle,
I'd be supporting a decent team."
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