How do you get a blonde to marry you?
Tell her she’s pregnant.
Similar jokes
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Q: Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven?
A: She didn't know what one came first.
There was a blonde, a redhead, and a brunette.
They were all trapped on an island and the nearest shore was 50 miles away.
The redhead swam trying to make it to the other shore she swam 15 miles, drowned, and died.
The brunette swam 24 miles, drowned, and died.
The blonde swam 25 miles, got tired, and swam back.
A road construction manager needed to hire someone to paint the yellow lines down the middle of a newly constructed road.
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all get hired.
They are each assigned a section of the road.
The first day, the blonde paints 2 miles, the redhead 1.5, and the brunette only 1.
On the second day, the blonde paints 1 mile, the brunette 2, and the redheaed 2.5.
On the third day, the blonde only gets 1/4 of a mile done, the redheaed 3, and the brunette 3.5.
The manager decides to talk to the blonde.
"You haven't been painting as much road as you did on the first day," the manager said.
"What's the problem?"
"I'd be painting more, but the bucket keeps getting farther and farther away!"
Q: What does a blonde do when it gets cold?
A: Sits around a candle
Q: What does she do when it gets really cold?
A: Lights it
A blonde's house was on fire.
She called 911 and started screaming, "Help me, please!
My house is burning! Hurry!"
The operator said, "Okay, calm down and we'll be there soon. How do we get to your house?"
The blonde answered, "Duh, in that big red truck!"
Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
A: Pregnant.
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead all enter a swim meet.
The gun goes off, and the brunette quickly captures first, with the redhead coming in second.
An hour later, the blonde emerges from the pool and complains to the judges that while she was doing the breast stroke, the others were using their arms.
This blonde goes into the drugstore looking for a birthday card.
She asks the clerk if they have any new and different cards — something unusual.
The clerk points her to a new card just in that day — “Happy Birthday to the Boy who Popped My Cherry.”
The blonde replied, “How cool! I’ll take the whole box!”
Q: Why would a blonde wear green lipstick?
A: Because red means Stop.
Q: How do you know a blonde just lost her virginity?
A: The crayons are still sticky.
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