Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar.
The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
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Chuck Norris can find Osama Bin Laden!
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Chuck Norris can win a game of chess by saying "Yahtzee!"
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Chuck Norris doesn't blink...reality pauses.
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When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off
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In the first Jurassic Park movie, the Tyrannosaurus Rex wasn't chasing the jeep.
Chuck Norris was chasing the Tyrannosaurus and the jeep.
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Chuck Norris once kicked Hulk in the face, so Hulk ran into the woods.
He is now known as Shrek.
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When Chuck Norris works out, he doesn't sweat.
His body cries.
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Chuck Norris looked Medusa straight in the eyes, and laughed.
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Chuck Norris often walks on Bikini Atoll during tests to get a tan.
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Chuck Norris Streams Netflix on his VCR.
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