When the metal detector goes off at the airport, it is just verifying Chuck Norris walked through.
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You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex?
Because he never fucks up.
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Cement took a teaspoon of Chuck Norris to harden up!
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Chuck Norris asked his script writer for more dialogue and the script writer said "Chuck you mean more grunting?"
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Chuck Norris can tap dance though a mine field... wearing clown shoes.
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Chuck Norris saved 100% on his car insurance by switching to Geico.
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Chuck Norris doesn't give warnings. He doesn't have to, you should already know.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use anti-virus. Viruses use anti-Chuck Norris.
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The easiest way to determine Chuck Norris' age is to cut him in half and count the rings.
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Chuck Norris looks at IEDs and the trigger man blows up.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need health care, everyone in his viewing range does.
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