When Chuck Norris' dreams come true, your worst nightmares begin.
When Chuck Norris works out at the gym, he doesn't sweat. The weights do.
It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
Chuck Norris would have attacked the Death Star with the Shield Generator still up.
Chuck Norris Turns his grass emo so it will cut itself.
Everybody loves Raymond. Except for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't need twitter, he's already following you.
The saying "Kill two birds with one stone" actually came from when chuck Norris downed two Peregrin Falcons with one roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris jokes are a oxymoron because Chuck Norris isn't a joke.