When Chuck Norris' dreams come true, your worst nightmares begin.
Chuch Norris doesn't make threats, he makes promises.
Chuck Norris had a knife thrown at him... the knife didn't impale him, he impaled the knife.
Chuck Norris does not play computer games, he makes games play computer!
When Chuck Norris has a heart attack, he attacks back.
Bruce Springsteen calls Chuck Norris 'The Boss'.
If looks could kill they would be called Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is the only person to know pi, because when he puts it into the calculator, the calculator doesn't dare give him only part of it.
Chucks Norris's mirror is scared to look at him.
When Chuck Norris finds fools' gold it automatically turns into real gold. Chuck Norris is nobody's fool.
Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone. This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.