Joke #4810

A man goes to a bar and sees a fat girl dancing on a table. He walks over to her and says, "Wow, nice legs!" She is flattered and replies, "You really think so?" The man says, "Oh definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now."
Vote:
has 81.19 % from 91 votes. More jokes about: life

Similar jokes

See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.

Mom can i buy some heels? No. Mom can i buy a bra? No. Mom can i buy a dress? No. Mom can i buy a barbie doll? No. You never let me buy anything! Shut up, Justin.
Vote:
has 70.33 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: life, music
Waiter, what is this stuff? That's bean salad sir. I know what it's been, but what is it now?
Vote:
has 48.26 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: life
The November 5th Gunpowder Plot has been described as the 9/11 of its day. Staged by the government to discredit an entire religion.
Vote:
has 47.62 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: life, political, religious, time
J: What did Miley Cyrus eat for Thanksgiving day? A: TWERKY!
Vote:
has 46.70 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, life, music, Thanksgiving
What's lil Wayne's favorite kind of pizza? Little Seizures. What? To soon?
Vote:
has 56.86 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: life, music
An archaeologist in Egypt was taking a walk in the town square one morning. He had to get back to the hotel for a meeting but had forgotten his wristwatch. He was walking by an old man sitting on a low stool by his camel and asked if he knew the time. The old man slowly reached over and pushed the camel's testicles to one side and then released them, letting them swing to a stop. "10:27" he said. The archaeologist was stunned as he had never seen someone tell time like that before. He rushed back to the hotel to find his colleagues and then brought them back to the town square to find the old man. Having found him again, the archaeologist said, "I will give you this $50 bill if you'll show me how you tell time. The old man pocketed the $50 bill and said, "OK, kneel down here with me and put your head close to mine. Now swing the camel's testicles out of the way. Now, can you see the clock on that building over there?"
Vote:
has 85.29 % from 222 votes. More jokes about: life
A Texan, a Russian and a New Yorker go to a restaurant in London. The waiter tells them, "Excuse me if you were going to order the steak, I'm afraid there's a shortage due to the mad cow disease." The Texan says, "What's a shortage?" The Russian says, "What's a steak?" The New Yorker says, "What's 'excuse me'?"
Vote:
has 76.06 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: food, life
A teacher asks her students to give her a sentence with the word "fascinate" in it. A little girl says, "Walt Disney World is fascinating." The teacher says, "No, I said, fascinate." Another little girl says, "There's so much fascination when it comes to sea life." The teacher again says, "No, the word is fascinate." Little Johnny yells from the back of the room, "My mom has such big boobs that she can only fasten eight of the 10 buttons on her shirt."
Vote:
has 81.02 % from 841 votes. More jokes about: communication, life, little Johnny, student, teacher
A Pontiac takes examinations for the driver’s licence for the fourth year in a row. The examiner asks him "So, you’re running on the street. You have a mountain on your right and there’s a cliff on your left. There are two women in your way; the one young and the other an old woman. Which one are you going to hit?" "Of course the old woman!" The examinet frustrated "I told you last year! You hit the brakes!"
Vote:
has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: age, car, life, old people, women
Is it true that 5 minutes of laugh prolongs your life by 5 minutes? It depends who you are laughing at – it may as well shorten it...
Vote:
has 75.73 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: life