Joke #4891

A man has his car full of penguins. He drives past a policeman, but the policeman stops him. He says. "Hey, you! Yeah, you! You should take those penguins to the zoo!" The man does that. The next day in the same spot, the man still has the penguins. Once again he drives past the policeman. "Hey, I thought I told you to take those penguins to the zoo!" "I did," replies the man. "We had so much fun that were going to the beach today!"

What did the bee say to the flower? "Hi, honey."

Barking dog at the back door wanting in and your wife's yelling at the front wanting in. Which one do you let in? The dog, once he's in, he shuts up!

I got a cat the other day. I had to swerve, but I got it.

Q: If your wife is shouting at the front door and your dog is barking at the back door, who do you let in first? A: The dog, of course. At least he'll shut up after you let him in.

What's a moo hoo for a tug-of-war between two longhorns? A bull pull.

There's two fish in a tank, and one says ''How do you drive this thing?''

How did the instructor try to make horse riding enjoyable? He tried to stirrup some interest!

Go to your back door and look for the dog. If the dog is at the door and he is wet, it's probably raining. But if the dog is standing there really soaking wet, it is probably raining really hard. If the dog's fur looks like it's been rubbed the wrong way, it's probably windy. If the dog has snow on his back, it's probably snowing. Of course, to be able to tell the weather like this, you have to leave the dog outside all the time, especially if you expect bad weather. Yours sincerely,  The CAT

The old mosquito puts the little baby’s to bed and tells them: If you are good, tomorrow I’m going to take you to the nudists.

Little Billy looks at the chimpanzees from the zoo. Mama, little Billy shouts, this monkey looks like our neighbour, Mr. Danny. Billy, it’s not polite to talk like that! Why? The chimpanzee doesn’t understand...