Joke #5166

What's the difference between a baby and a grandmother? Grandmothers don't die when you fuck them up the ass.
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has 28.82 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: disgusting

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I was having a shit in the train toilet today, when some bloke knocked on the door. He said, "Can I see your ticket please?" "Not right now" I shouted, "I'm having a shit!" He said, "I don't believe you, can you pass it under the door?" "No problem," I said, sliding it under. "The yellow bits are sweetcorn."
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has 71.40 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Two statues, male and female, faced each other in the city park for many years. An angel appeared before the statues and said, "Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you the gift of life. You have 30 minutes to do whatever you desire." The statues came to life and smiled at each other. They ran toward some nearby woods and dove behind a couple of bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he listened to the two statues giggling, bushes rustling and twigs snapping. After 15 minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, satisfied and smiling. Puzzled, the angel looked at his watch and asked the statues, "You still have 15 minutes. Would you like to continue?" The male statue looked at the female and asked, "Do you want to do it again?" Giggling, the female statue said, "Sure, but this time, you hold the pigeon down and I'll crap on its head!"
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has 81.81 % from 191 votes. More jokes about: animal, couple, disgusting, life, time
What's funner then nailing bin Laden to a tree? Feeding his lifeless corpse into a meat grinder.
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has 26.83 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, disgusting, war
A sexology professor announced that if any man over 50 eats 2 or 3 dates with a raw garlic clove he never fails in sex problems. This prescription makes his dick strong and heathy. There is only one side effect. That diet causes he blows many farts daily!
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has 60.02 % from 292 votes. More jokes about: dating, dirty, disgusting, fart, sex
Yo mama's lips are so big when you smile you wet your hair.
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has 44.67 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, ugly, Yo mama
A man farts in bed next to his wife. His wife asks, "What in the world was that?" He replies, "Touchdown. I'm winning, seven nothing." She decides to get even, so she lets one loose. He yells at her, "What was that?" She replies, "Touchdown, tie score." He wants to get her back, but he tries so hard he sh*ts in bed. The wife asks, "Now what in the world was that?" He replies, "Halftime, switch sides."
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has 68.65 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart, sport, wife
Two skunks observed a deer hunter sneaking through the woods with a rifle. "I hope he's not going to shoot at us," said one skunk. The second skunk bowed his head and said, "Let us spray."
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has 57.17 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, hunting, mean
Q: What does a Polish bride get on her wedding night that's long and hard? A: A new last name.
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has 74.15 % from 97 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, ethnic, wedding
A man visits his aunt in the nursing home. It turns out that she is taking a nap, so he just sits down in a chair in her room, flips through a few magazines, and munches on some peanuts sitting in a bowl on the table. Eventually, the aunt wakes up, and her nephew realizes he’s absentmindedly finished the entire bowl of peanuts. "I’m so sorry, auntie, I’ve eaten all of your peanuts!" "That’s okay, dearie," the aunt replied. "After I’ve sucked the chocolate off, I don’t care for them anyway."
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has 52.41 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: chocolate, disgusting, family, food
Q: What did Jeffrey Dahmer do after dumping his boyfriend? A: He wiped.
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has 44.24 % from 10 votes. More jokes about: disgusting