Chuck Norris is the only person to really have "Birthdays".
The rest of us have "Thank you Chuck for allowing me to live another year- days".
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When Clark Kent goes into a phonebooth, Superman comes out.
When Chuck Norris goes into a phone booth, it explodes and Chuck walks away.
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Rocky Balboa was a lucky man because Chuck Norris didn't pursue a boxing carreer.
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Chuck Norris cuts paper by sticking his fingers out in a V and moving them up and down.
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We live in an expanding universe.
All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is the only person who can kick someone in the back of the face.
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Chuck Norris can breath out with his nose and breath in with his mouth at the same time.
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Q: Do you know why infinity goes on forever?
A: Because it knows Chuck Norris is waiting for it at the end.
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Chuck Norris doesn't break bricks.
They fold under pressure.
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Chuck Norris invented the question mark... so he could say the sentence "Do you want to die slowly of fast?"
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If Chuck Norris jumped off the Empire State Building, your mom would tell you to do it too.
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