Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch.
He simply decides what time it is.
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The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake was when he thought he made a mistake
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Chuck Norris counted to infinity - three times.
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Chuck Norris helps little old ladies cross the street...
Bad guys get kicked to the curb!
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There is no such thing as an endangered species, they are Chuck's likes and dislikes.
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Chuck Norris pitties Mr. T.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use GUI, he prefers the command line.
Chuck Norris only needs one bullet, because it should know to get back in the chamber.
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If it looks like chicken tastes like chicken and smells like chicken and Chuck Norris says it's beef then it's beef.
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tadpole and turned it into a frog, then he kicked it again and it died.
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The reason the Holy Grail has never been recovered is because nobody is brave enough to ask Chuck Norris to give up his favourite coffee mug.
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