Chuck Norris doesn't have an Ipod, he has an Ifist.
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If you want to commit suicide, all you need to do is say,"Chuck Norris is a loser."
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Chuck Norris once fell off a ladder, it immediately became a chair and caught him out of fear.
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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
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Once visiting Arizona, Chuck Norris spat on the ground.
The place is now known as the meteor crater.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use his hand to catch bullets, he uses his mind.
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Chuck Norris can play a whole note in 3/4 time.
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Chuck Norris met an exclamation point and punched it in the face.
We now have questions.
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Chuck Norris invented hot sauce.
To put on his peppers.
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When raining, Chuck Norris doesn't need an umbrella , he can dodge the rain drops.
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Chuck Norris once broke a mirror over the head of a black cat while standing under a ladder on Friday the thirteenth.
The next day he won the lottery.
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