Chuck Norris jumps on hand grenades to shave his chest hair.
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Chuck Norris walks into a bar... the beer starts to run.
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Barcelona beats every team in the world, Chuck Norris can beat Barcelona... by himself.
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The hardest known subsatance in the universe is Chuck Norris's will.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why Einstein's theory of relativity is still a theory.
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Chuck Norris can surf on lava.
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Chuck Norris was born feet first.
It was the only time a doctor died during childbirth.
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Chuck Norris really can get chicken from a tuna can.
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A watched kettle never boils... unless Chuck Norris is doing the watching, in which case it explodes.
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Chuck Norris does not eat.
Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.
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Chuck Norris once gave a man an apple.
Today that man is known as Steve Jobs.
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