Chuck Norris watched the entire Lord of the Rings without blinking.
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When Chuck Norris was 5 he threw a paper airplane.
It landed yesterday.
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Chuck Norris stem cells can reproduce missing limbs.
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When Chuck Norris works out at the gym, he doesn't sweat.
The weights do.
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Why did we have a global recession?
Because Chuck Norris asked "Whats a global Recession?"
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Chuck Norris isn't appropriate... appropriate isn't Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris believes in victim's rights.
His victims have the right to dig their own graves before he kills them.
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Where was your mom last night?
At Chuck Norris' place.
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A company once tried to make Chuck Norris toilet paper, but they soon realized it wouldn't work because Chuck Norris won't take shit from anyone.
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Chuck Norris can smell sound and hear touch.
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Chuck Norris can give you a wet willie with a dry finger.
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