Chuck Norris can get breakfast at McDonalds after 11, at Taco Bell.
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Chuck Norris doesn't blink...reality pauses.
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Chuck Norris can turn on clapper lights by flexing.
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Chuck Norris eats lightning and shits out thunder.
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The only reason you woke up this morning is because Chuck Norris allowed you too.
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Chuck Norris can mute silence.
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Chuck Norris isn't a cat person but if he was, he would own 3 lions, a snow leopard, and cougar.
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The Total Gym uses Chuck Norris to stay in shape.
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The role of terminator was originaly played by Chuck Norris, but they decided against it as no-one would want to shit their pants for two hours strait.
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Chuck Norris can fall up.
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Chuck Norris Turns his grass emo so it will cut itself.
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