Chuck Norris can get breakfast at McDonalds after 11, at Taco Bell.
Chuck Norris actually died 10 years ago. The grim reaper just hasn't summed up enough courage to face Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris's black belt was made in a black hole.
When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris sprinted 2 marathons - backwards.
Chuck Norris is the reason you turn a light on when you enter a room.
Chuck Norris can ski up a mountain.
When Chuck Norris makes a burrito, its main ingredient is real toes.
Michael Jordan is the greatest basketball player of all-time because Chuck Norris never played.
Chuck Norris went to school so he could be studied.
Jesus can walk on water, but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.