There will never be a zombie apocalypse, because when Chuck Norris bites zombies, they turn back into humans.
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When Chuck Norris falls out of a boat , he dosn't hit water...
That's because Chuck Norris would never fall out of a boat it the first place.
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Chuck Norris won the World Series of Poker using Pokemon cards.
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People say that time heals all wounds.
They obviously never got roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris is the only one that can turn lemonade into lemons.
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Chuck Norris can bungee jump with out a rope.
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When Chuck Norris opens a bag of Doritos, it's fucking full!
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Hip-Hop is dead because of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris runs Windows Vista, and it has never crashed.
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Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as "You Know Who."
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Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he dares his grass to grow.
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