Chuck Norris beat a brick wall at tennis.
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Chuck Norris does not understand any phrase that begins with "if at first you don't succeed."
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Evolution ended the day Chuck Norris was born.
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Chuck Norris uses pepper spray to clear his sinuses.
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Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris tells his GPS when he wants to turn.
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Chuck Norris found the fountain of youth, but...he wasn't thirsty.
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When Chuck Norris sets his watch, he sets time itself.
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Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour.
He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
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Racehorses have to pee like Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris was once bitten by a venomous cobra ....
After 5 days of excrutiating pain the cobra
Eventually died
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