Chuck Norris can make a robot bleed.
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Chuck Norris can fire Vince McMahon.
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The burning bush that Moses spoke of was actually Chuck Norris's beard!
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Thunder is caused by Chuck Norris rubbing the stubble on his chin.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid, he entered a pool bombing competition.
This place now widely known as the Niagara Falls.
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Chuck Norris can pour a pancake so thin that it only has one side.
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The wrecking ball in the Miley Cyrus video isn't a wrecking ball it's one of Chuck Norris testicles.
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Chuck Norris walked his version of a 40-yard dash in 5.6 seconds; he was later told it was the Boston Marathon.
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When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ass, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face.
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Chuck Norris "Caught 'Em All " twice.
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Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
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