Chuck Norris can make a robot bleed.
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Chuck Norris can won the winter Olympics...
In the summer.
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Chuck Norris is so powerful he can jumpstart a car by attaching the cables to his chest hair.
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AIDS Can't Kill Chuck Norris.
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You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex?
Because he never fucks up.
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Thunder is caused by Chuck Norris rubbing the stubble on his chin.
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Chuck Norris likes his coffee half and half: half coffee grounds, half wood-grain alcohol.
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Chuck Norris once played with Legos.
The result was The Great Pyramids.
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The first paper money press was invented when Chuck Norris drew a design under his boot and stepped on a tree.
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When Chuck Norris has a heart attack, he attacks back.
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Justin Timberlake didn't bring sexy back Chuck Norris did.
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