Chuck Norris knows your reading this...
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Chuck Norris invented 1080p so people could see his beard is made of razor wire.
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In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.
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Chuck Norris wins every political campaign, but politely declines the jobs.
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Chuck Norris was the Best Man at his own wedding.
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Chuck Norris doesn't run out of bullets, bullets run out of Norrises.
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One time Chuck Norris saluted an American flag and it blushed.
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When Chuck Norris got stung by a bee, the Bee had an allergic reaction called Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once broke the law... with his fists.
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Before going to bed, the Boogeyman always checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
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Water can't breath under Chuck Norris.
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