Ozzy Osbourne once accidentally bit the head off a live bat - Chuck Norris once deliberately bit the head off a live pterodactyl.
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When Chuck Norris steals a car he forces it to start.
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Chuck Norris had a knife thrown at him... the knife didn't impale him, he impaled the knife.
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Chuck Norris kills time in his spare time.
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Chuck Norris is the only person that can deliver a roundhouse kick in full 1080p, remember that the next time you watch Walker Texas Ranger in Blu-Ray.
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Chuck Norris can only text if the phone's touch screen is bullet proof.
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Bruce Wayne first tried wearing a Chuck Norris mask to inspire fear, until he saw himself in the mirror.
He immediately changed to the Batman
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When Bell invented the telephone, there were already three Chuck Noris missed
calls.
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Superman is faster then a speeding bullet.
Chuck Norris just runs Superman down and keeps going.
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The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris.
The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction.
No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
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Chuck Norris invented his own brand of media disc.
The Black and Blueray.
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