Chuck Norris does not need guns to win, he only uses them to fight fairly.
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While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.
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In the first Jurassic Park movie, the Tyrannosaurus Rex wasn't chasing the jeep.
Chuck Norris was chasing the Tyrannosaurus and the jeep.
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Show me a man with a nub for an index finger, and I'll show you a man that asked Chuck Norris to "Pull my Finger"
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Chuck Norris once made an omelette from a Fabergé egg.
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Chuck Norris CAN leave Hotel California.
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Chuck Norris once had a weak moment, just to know what it felt like.
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Chuck Norris can hear the sound of one hand clapping.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he saw a fat chick, he roundhouse kicked her so hard she transformed.
She is now known as Britney Spears.
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When Chuck Norris talks, E.F. Hutton listens.
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Chuck Norris once replied to a 'no-reply' mail, and got the answer he wanted.
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