Joke #9095

Chuck Norris does not need guns to win, he only uses them to fight fairly.
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When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
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When Chuck Norris wants salmon he eats the bear too.
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Last year Chuck Norris won the prize for best float at the Carnival in Rio simply by walking in the parade wearing his cowboy hat.
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In 1666, Chuck Norris caught the Plague. The Plague learned its lesson, and has stayed away since then.
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Chuck Norris does not cleanse himself with your everyday shower. He uses Meteor Showers.
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The universe expands because the stars believe this way will be safer from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.
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Ozzy Ozbourne once bit the head off a bat. Not one to be outdone, Chuck Norris bit the head off Batman!
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Who would win in a fight between a bear and a lion? Answer - neither, Chuck Norris would beat them both with a single round-house-kick.
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Chuck Norris can spit through bulletproof glass.
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