Joke #9730

Those who ignore history, are doomed by Chuck Norris.

To finally solve whether Mona-Lisa is smiling or not, Chuck Norris took a quick look at it. She's crying

Chuck Norris is the only person who can write history of the future.

The answer to all the questions on your history test tomorrow is Chuck Norris.

“The Day the Earth Stood Still” is based off the one day in Earth’s history when Chuck Norris slept.

Only once in history has Chuck Norris snapped his fingers, scientists call it The Big Bang.

Before the 16th century, the sun really did go around the earth. Chuck Norris just decided to change it as a prank.

Reading Chuck Norris Facts is the same as learning history.

Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.

Elderly Man: "Father, during the war I allowed a Jewish refugee to live in my attic." Priest: "I do not see anything wrong with that. You helped a poor soul survive the war." Elderly Man: "I collected rent from him for every month that he stayed." Priest: "That's not a good thing you did, but it was for a good cause. You helped him survive." Elderly Man: "Should I tell him the war is over?"

One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, "It's going to rain." His wife asked, "How do you know?" "Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."