Chuck Norris never actually moves.
He merely rotates the earth with his feet.
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When Chuck Norris goes through airport security he makes them take their shoes off.
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Chuck Norris' shadow stays ten steps behind him in fear of a roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use anti-virus. Viruses use anti-Chuck Norris.
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When God said "Let there be light!", Chuck Norris said "Only for half the day."
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Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant.
The steak did what it was told.
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Chuck Norris Streams Netflix on his VCR.
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Chuck Norris was mauled by a bear once, then the bear woke up and apologized.
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Chuk Norris was only twice angry, and those times are known as WWI and WWII.
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In 1945 Chuck Norris drank a Redbull and jumped out a plane. For image results, Google the word Hiroshima.
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Chuck Norris can fall up.
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