Chuck Norris never actually moves.
He merely rotates the earth with his feet.
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Chuck Norris can get a touchdown in baseball.
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The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there.
In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
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Chuck Norris doesn't go on the Internet, he has every Internet site stored in his memory.
He refreshes webpages by blinking.
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ChuckNorris.com.
Don't go there.
It's like the United States of Chuck Norris...
No one has been there and lived to tell the tale.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
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Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
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Where does the devil go when he dies?
He goes to Chuck Norris for an eternity of roundhouse kicks.
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Chuck Norris can choke you to life.
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Chuck Norris found the 51st shade of gray.
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When you die on Earth you go to hell.
When you die in hell you go to Chuck Norris' house.
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