Chuck Norris doesn't use anti-virus. Viruses use anti-Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is the only one that can turn lemonade into lemons.
Chuck Norris can make you fold a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris can do the splits in mid air,rotate his hips 360" so fast it lifts him off the ground thus making the Chuck Copter!
Chuck Norris can win a game of chess by saying "Yahtzee!"
Chuck Norris does not understand any phrase that begins with "if at first you don't succeed."
When Chuck Norris punches someone in the stomach they get hit in the back of the head.
Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but even Jack couldn't avoid Chuck Norris' round house kick.
When Chuck Norris surfs the Internet, he actually surfs on a virtual wave of 1's and 0's.
Chuck Norris met an exclamation point and punched it in the face. We now have questions.
You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In reality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.