Chuck Norris sprinted 2 marathons - backwards.
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Chuck Norris has heard the actual voice of Charlie Brown's teacher...
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Once while having s*x in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and ran into the engine.
We now know this truck....as Optimus Prime.
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Chuck Norris can piss into Gale force winds.
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Titanic crashed into Chuck Norris' cut out toe nail.
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Chuck Norris once won a blinking contest against a statue!
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Chuck Norris beat a laser beam in a race.
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The housing market crashed because Chuck thought he was paying too much property tax.
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Chuck Norris was born feet first.
It was the only time a doctor died during childbirth.
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Some say Chuck once sneezed a rhino inside out.
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When the President pushes the big red button, Chuck Norris's cell phone rings.
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