Chuck Norris sprinted 2 marathons - backwards.
There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Chuck Norris.
Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight.
Chuck Norris discovered America.
Chuck Norris protects his body guards.
The actual definition of U.F.O is Chuck Norris's Toy Frisbee.
Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
Once chuck norris and time had race. Result: The time is still running.
Chuck Norris can see all 50 states from his house.
Chuck Norris has nicknames for his feet... Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.