Chuck Norris sprinted 2 marathons - backwards.
Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
Chuck Norris asked his script writer for more dialogue and the script writer said "Chuck you mean more grunting?"
Chuck Norris can talk with his mouth closed.
The names 'Adam and Eve' were simply coverups. They were really Chuck and Norris.
Chuck Norris does not wear a seatbelt and reclines his seat before takeoff and landing on an airplane because he can.
Chuck Norris can in fact eat water.
30 lumberjacks once tried to cut off Chuck Norris's beard... They were never seen again.
Chuck Norris found the 51st shade of gray.
When Chuck Norris looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Chuck Norris and Chuck Norris.
Simon doesn't say... Chuck Norris says.