Chuck Norris is in every action film ever made but sometimes he only shows up as EXPLOSIONS.
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Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
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Chuck Norris can stand at the bottom of a bottomless pit.
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Chuck Norris, Mr T and Arnold Swieznigger died in a plane crash they got to heavens door way and god asked them what there business is. Arnold replied "I want to be your right hand man".
Mr T said "I wanna be your left hand man".
Chuck Norris said "get the fuck out of my chair".
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Chuck Norris watched the tape from The Ring.
His phone rang and when he answered a scared voice said "Excuse me, the wrong number"
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Death once took Chuck Norris.
He regreted it.
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There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard.
There is only another fist.
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It's not the fall that kills you, it's Chuck Norris waiting for you at the bottom.
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The light at the end of the tunnel is actually Chuck Norris holding a flashlight.
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When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.
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Chuck Norris won gold for sitting in the crowd at the olympics.
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