Chuck Norris can copy and paste on a typewriter.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
It's call a Chuck Steak because Chuck just kicked that cow's butt.
Chuck Norris and Justin Bieber once had a singing contest, the loser had to never hit puberty.
Clark Kent had to call himself "Superman" because "Chuck Norris" was already taken.
It's not the fall that kills you, it's Chuck Norris waiting for you at the bottom.
Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life. When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life."
The second hardest element in the universe is Chuck Norris. The first only comes into existance when Chuck gets excited.
The Mayans predict that Chuck Norris going to roundhouse kick this earth in the year 2012.
For some, the left testicle is larger than the right one. For Chuck Norris, each testicle is larger than the other one