Joke #6294

Chuck Norris sleeps with a pillow under his gun.
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Batman is to Robin as Chuck Norris is to Death.
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The phrase "I am become death, destroyer of worlds" was actually first coined by Chuck Norris when he came out of the womb.
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Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.
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Facebook had a dislike button, then Chuck Norris joined. Nobody dislikes Chuck Norris.
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Before Chuck Norris can register as a soldier, all wars suddenly end.
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Water holds its breath when Chuck Norris is in below the surface.
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Chuck Norris paints little red wagons for a living with his victim's blood. But not the wheels. That's just wrong.
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Death once took Chuck Norris. He regreted it.
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Chuck Norris invented Kentucky Fried Chicken's famous secret recipe, with eleven herbs and spices. But nobody ever mentions the twelfth ingredient: Fear.
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Chuck Norris can locate the nowhere.
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