The following is a short list of what Chuck Norris cannot do: .
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Count from one to ten.
That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
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He opens the door then turns the handle.
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Eminem says "I'm not afraid".
Chuck Norris says "I love the way you lie"
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Chuck Norris has a six-pack on his chin.
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Dinosaurs once crossed Chuck Norris.
Once.
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Chuck Norris made Journey stop beleiving.
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Chuck Norris can stare you to death while looking the other direction!
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Archeologists unearthed an old English dictionary dating back to the year 1236.
It defined "victim" as "one who has encountered Chuck Norris"
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Chuck Norris can watch music.
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Chuck Norris froze hell.
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