The following is a short list of what Chuck Norris cannot do: .
Chuck Norris invented 1080p so people could see his beard is made of razor wire.
Chuck Norris goes on Jeopardy and doesn't answer in the form of a question.
Chuck Norris won the World Series of Poker using Pokemon cards.
Chuck Norris leaves messages before the beep.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost.
If Chuck Norris punches you in your dream you will wake up with bruises.
How long does it take Chuck Norris to get to Asia? 2 months... How does he get there? He walks.
In reality, only Chuck Norris is allowed to sing "We are the Champions". He has no time for losers. He will rock you.
A Chuck Norris round house kick is considered the first "super-collider".
Chuck Norris doesn't jump. He moves the ground away from him.