The following is a short list of what Chuck Norris cannot do: .
Not everyone that Chuck Norris is mad at gets killed. Some get away. They are called astronauts.
Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but even Jack couldn't avoid Chuck Norris' round house kick.
Lightning doesn't strike Chuck Norris, chuck norris strikes lightning!
Chuck Norris can make music in Adobe Photoshop.
Chuck Norris is the reason there is wind. The air tries to get away from him as fast as possible.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris can make a pound cake with only an ounce.
Big Foot discovered Chuck Norris and hid in the forest.
Chuck Norris's black belt was made in a black hole.