Chuck Norris once broke the land bike speed record with a bike with a lost chain and a missing back wheel.
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Despite popular belief, there is no such thing as a tornado.
Chuck Norris just doesn't like trailer parks.
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Chuck Norris has a six-pack on his chin.
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When Chuck Norris goes skydiving at 10,000 feet he jumps into the plane... from the ground.
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Chuck Norris is the reason you turn a light on when you enter a room.
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Everytime a star explodes, it's because one of Chuck Norris's victims just landed there after being round-house kicked.
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Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
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Chuck Norris ate a sheet of paper, then later found an origami swan in the toilet.
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When Chuck Norris lifts weights, the weights get stronger.
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Chuck Norris can kill a man in 52 different ways using only a ballpoint pen.
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Chuck Norris was once asked to place his legs and fists in the cargo bay of a plane because weapons aren't allowed in the cabin.
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