Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
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When Chuck Norris eats teddy grahams, he craps out grizzly bears.
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Chuck Norris jumps on hand grenades to shave his chest hair.
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Chuck Norris is the reason terrorists hide in caves.
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The reason why the desert is dry is because Chuck Norris got thirsty.
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Chuck Norris can convert kilograms into centimeters.
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Chuck Norris can whistle in five different languages, including sign language.
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Chuck Norris can't be racist, because to him there are no people, just light and dark targets.
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Chuck Norris can drink an entire gallon of milk in forty-seven seconds.
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Chuck Norris can paint the rainbow... with black.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a Facebook, he has a Fistbook...
No one's his friend.
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