Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
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The Universe is not expanding.
It's running away from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can sink a hole in none!
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Chuck Norris once won a rap battle against Eminem.
He just kept saying "Chuck Norris" in a raplike-fashion.
The crowds' heads exploded from amazement.
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Chuck Norris once sued the Houghton-Mifflin textbook company when it became apparent that their account of the war of 1812 was plagiarized from his autobiography.
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Chuck Norris once slapped a man into next week.
The man was missing for four and a half years.
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Chuck Norris made the universe... out of his snot and left kidney.
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Before the 16th century, the sun really did go around the earth.
Chuck Norris just decided to change it as a prank.
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Chuck Norris never dies.
And of course, he will also never fade away.
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Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time.
He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
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Chuck Norris can use a Shake Weight without looking gay.
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