When Chuck Norris lifts weights, the weights get stronger.
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Death once got sentenced to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris uses 8'x10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper.
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Chuck Norris doesn't even have to bid in an auction to win it.
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Chuck Norris uses an air bag... in order to protect the inside of his car in case he stops too fast.
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Chuck Norris can choke you to life.
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The only mark ever made on Chuck Norris is his birth mark.
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Superman is faster then a speeding bullet.
Chuck Norris just runs Superman down and keeps going.
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CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.
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Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands.
They are now The Islands.
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Night time... when Chuck Norris tells the sun it's time for bed.
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