If you want a list of Chuck Norri's enemies, just check the extinct species list.
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When Chuck Norris hired his bodyguards, he figured he was paying to save someone.
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Chuck Norris had a knife thrown at him... the knife didn't impale him, he impaled the knife.
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Chuck Norris can strum your pain with his fingers, tell your whole life with his words – but mainly just kill you softly with his song.
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Before sliced bread, people used to say "That's the greatest thing since Chuck Norris".
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15 years ago I started a burping contest with Chuck Norris... who had the longest?
I don't know he is still busy.
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Chuck Norris favorite pick up line: ''now''
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When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.
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Chuck Norris can watch an episode of 60 Minutes in a half-hour.
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A bulletproof jacket is an imitation of Chuck Norris' beard.
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Chuck Norris has a deep and abiding respect for human life... unless it gets in his way.
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