Oxygen needs Chuck Norris to survive.
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Chuck Norris sent a e-mail through the postal service.
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Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour.
He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
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Chuck Norris has hair of steel wool.
That's why his mullet never moves.
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When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.
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Chuck Norris can't be racist, because to him there are no people, just light and dark targets.
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If Chuck Norris met Dora the Explorer, he'd introduce her to his Boots.
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Chuck Norris has a diary.
It's called the Guinness Book of World Records.
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Chuck Norris never suffers from a heart attack.
His heart is too smart to not attack him.
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Do you know why the Earth's spinning ?
Because Chuck Norris is running on it.
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Chuck Norris can beatbox with a triangle.
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