Oxygen needs Chuck Norris to survive.
When I was a kid, my Chuck Norris action figure broke all my other toys while I was at school. When my mom tried to throw him away, he killed her.
Chuck Norris sprinted 2 marathons - backwards.
Only Chuck Norris can dislike on Facebook.
In 2011 someone asked Chuck Norris if he had ever been to Portugal. He answered: "Where?" The country went bankrupt.
Chuck Norris doesn't need twitter, he's already following you.
Chuck Norris wears white to a funeral, no one asks why.
According to CNN, Chuck Norris was commanding the SEAL team in Afghanistan. When Osama found that out, he shot himself in the head.
Chuck Norris doesn't break bricks. They fold under pressure.
He opens the door then turns the handle.