Chuck Norris can braid a bald head.
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The reason everything is better in Texas is because Chuck Norris said so.
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The president of the USA lives in the White House.
Chuck Norris lives in the Roundhouse.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a particle accelerator to collide atoms, he just smashes his fists together.
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Who do you think would win in a fight? Godzilla or King Kong
Neither, Chuck Norris doesn't let his pets fight!
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James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator.
However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
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Chuck Norris won the Tour De France on a stationary bike.
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Chuck Norris' pulse-rate is measured on the Richter Scale.
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If it were true that you are what you eat.
Then you are about to be a roundhouse kick.
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Black Holes are places where parallel universes are hiding from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris does not get parking tickets;
he gets "thank you for parking anywhere" notes.
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