Q: Why is Chuck Norris still alive?
A: Death remembers the feeling of the round-house kick.
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When Chuck Norris drives a Lamborghini, people assume the Llamborghini is compensating for something.
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Chuck Norris can block Mark Zuckerberg's Facebook account.
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Hurricanes are really just Chuck Norris breathing into the rain.
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Chuk Norris was only twice angry, and those times are known as WWI and WWII.
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Chuck Norris knows what the secret crabby patty recipe is.
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Chuck Norris can cash two party, out of state checks with no ID, or else!
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During the Vietnam War, Chuck Norris allowed himself to be captured.
For torture, they made him eat his own entrails.
He asked for seconds.
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Chuck Norris once entered a black hole just to see what was in it.
Dissapointed, he then walked out.
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When Chuck Norris goes to a BBL cricket game, he doesn't watch out for the big hits from the players, the big hits watch out for him!
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Not everyone that Chuck Norris is mad at gets killed.
Some get away.
They are called astronauts.
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