Chuck Norris can speak braille.
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Chuck Norris uses a gun to be humane.
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When Chuck crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a Facebook, he has a Fistbook...
No one's his friend.
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They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
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If Chuck were in the movie Nightmare On Elm Street then it would be renamed nightmare on Chuck Norris Street, cuz nobody dared to get near him.
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Chuck Noris once got his blood tested.
His blood type was AK-47.
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Chuck Norris kissed a girl once.
She's still blushing, we call her Sun.
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When Chuck Norris gets pulled over he read the officers his rights.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need to mow his lawn, He dares the grass to grow.
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Chuck Norris only needs one bullet, because it should know to get back in the chamber.
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