Chuck Norris can speak braille.
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Chuck Norris CAN have it both ways.
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When you die on Earth you go to hell.
When you die in hell you go to Chuck Norris' house.
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There will never be a zombie apocalypse, because when Chuck Norris bites zombies, they turn back into humans.
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Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
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Lightening is too slow to strike Chuck Norris.
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Simply by pulling on both ends, Chuck Norris can stretch diamonds back into coal.
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Chuck Norris' beard can etch a sketch a picture of chuck killing a man.
When the last line is drawn, that man dies!
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Chuck Norris writes on pencils with paper.
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Chuck Norris' name is never on the guest list - because if Chuck Norris turns up, Chuck Norris gets in.
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Chuck Norris once won a blinking contest against a statue!
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