Chuck Norris' beard has it's own Social Security number.
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Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.
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Kids dream about having superpowers.
Superpowers dream about having Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris flew boats in the Vietnam War.
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Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother’s womb.
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Chuck Norris CAN read Lady Gaga's poker face.
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Chuck Norris can kiss his own elbow, both at the same time.
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Chuck Norris once ate a bottle of sleeping pills.
They made him blink.
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Chuck Norris fell off a building, he got sued for breaking the sidewalk with his fists.
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Chuck Norris once played with Legos.
The Ancient Egyptians still thank him for it.
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When Chuck Norris touched a Prius, it turned into a Ferrari
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