Chuck Norris installed his own home security system. It's called "Chuck Norris."
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Chuck Norris once had a bet with the Hulk, the loser had to paint himself green.
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Chuck Norris doesn't blink...reality pauses.
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Chuck Norris doesn't play dead for bears, bears play dead for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris built Rome with a box of scraps.
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When Chuck Norris visits Europe on vacation, France surrenders.
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Chuck Norris can swim and skydive at the same time.
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With just two toothpicks, a lightbulb, and his RoundHouse Kick, Chuck Norris can override the Pentagon's computer system.
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The Earth was flat until Chuck Norris looked in it's direction...then it rolled up into a ball.
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Chuck Norris called McDonald's through the television.
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When you insult Chuck Norris, the next thing you are going to see is a bunch of halos.
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